GO TEAM VENTURE!!

Thank whatever god or goat or flying spaghetti monster you pray to because they have seen fit to bless us with yet another season of The Venture Bros! Let the soft white gelatin of your eyeballs twitch in orgasmic release as the creeping euphoric giddiness crawls up your spine, laying it’s heavenly eggs of fantasmagoria deep in gooey center of your brain!

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No Love for Donatello

From CollegeHumor.com comes the funniest damn TMNT parody I’ve seen. I need this to be a whole show now.

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I never did want to be Donatello as a kid but he deserves better than this.

Thanks to Bam!Kapow! for sharing.

The Foot Clan is Now Accepting Applications!

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That’s right ninjas and ninjettes, The Shredder wants you! If you happen to be a major league butt-kicker in the LA area, you can audition to have your ass handed to you by some over-sized amphibians going through their awkward phase.

Here’s how!

Martial Arts Experts – Open Casting Call Auditions – Martial Artist Wanted for New Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Motion Picture

The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, in association with Mirage Studios, 4Kids Entertainment and TMNT Productions will host an open casting call for martial arts experts to audition for the upcoming Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie, hitting theatres in 2011. We will select the best from the auditions to be a part of the stealth TMNT nemesis, the Foot Clan.

The casting call is part of the 25th Anniversary Shell-ebration of the “Heroes on a Half Shell” in 2009, and a great way to bring together all schools of martial arts to become part of the new generation of TMNT.

We’re reaching out to ask for your participation in spreading the word to your associates, friends and family within the martial arts community. Details of the event are below, and final rules/regulations will be posted shortly.

When: Saturday, July 18, 2009 10:00 a.m. – 1:00 p.m.

Where: Hollywood & Highland

6801 Hollywood Boulevard

Los Angeles, CA 90028

*At Grand Staircase

Who: Judges to include actor and martial arts expert Ernie Reyes, Jr., Jason Morgan from the American Taekwondo Association, and 2011 TMNT movie producers Scott Mednick and Galen Walker.

Audition: 30-Second Martial Arts Demo (Single Person Only)

No metal, sharp or bladed weapons of any kind allowed

Photo and updated resume with contact information

Fourteen years or older (under 18 must have adult permission for audition)

Hot damn, if only I’d kept up with those karate lessons when I was 10!

Faithful fans may recognize one of those judges, Mr. Ernie Reyes Jr.,  as a certain high-kicking pizza delivery boy!

Good luck to anyone trying out! Just remember, if you find yourself in a showdown with the Turtles, don’t just stand around awkwardly waiting for your turn, you don’t have to fight them one at a time, strength in numbers people!

Lock Up Your Wife and Children, El Superbeasto is Coming!

superbeasto_logo

That’s right kids! Rob Zombie’s animated sex and monsters comedy The Haunted World of El Superbeasto is finally coming to DVD and Blu-ray September 22!

Watch in bone chilling horror and crotch tingling excitement as former luchador extraordinaire, El Superbeasto (Tom Papa) teams up with his sultry sister Suzi-X (Sheri Moon Zombie) to take on the demonic Dr. Satan (Paul Giamatti) and his unholy bride to be; the lewd, lurid and nefarious stripper known as Velvet Von Black (Rosario Dawson)!

Among the others lending vocal talents to this debaucherous toon are Tom Kenny, Danny Trejo, Clint Howard, Harland Williams, Brian Posehn, and as an additional treat for Zombie fans, Bill Mosely and Sid Haig return as Otis and Capt. Spaulding!

It’s been over 2 years now since it was originally scheduled for release so I’m thrilled it’s finally going to see the light of day! There simply aren’t enough vulgar monster sex romp cartoons in the world, so thank you Mr. Zombie for this service to humanity.

No trailer available yet here are a couple clips tame enough for mass consumption courtesy of Amazon.com

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90’s X-Men Cartoon Hits DVD Tomorrow!

After a long wait, X-Fans can finally pick up Volumes 1 & 2 of this classic cartoon of the 90’s on DVD tomorrow!

x-men

Aside from grabbing a few stray issues of various X-Men titles as a lad, my real initiation into Marvel’s menagerie of mutants was this animated series. Despite having to tone down the violence for young children (sorry Wolverine), it remains to this day one of the most faithful animated adaptations of any comic series. Debuting October 31st, 1992 and continuing to run for 5 years, writers worked in such classic X-Men tales as Days of Future Past and The Dark Phoenix Saga, among others. They also managed to stay true to the series’ themes of bigotry and social injustice, fairly groundbreaking stuff for a Saturday morning children’s cartoon! It made X-Men a household name, paving the way for the breakout hit feature film in 2000. Not to mention it had one kick ass theme song which I still hear in my head to this day when I think of the X-Men!

25 Years of Turtle Power!

TMNT

Not since Star Wars had a pop culture phenomenon so consumed an entire generation. Like the vast majority of kids growing up in the 80’s/early 90’s I was freakishly obsessed with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Of course it all started for me when I saw the original cartoon and had the theme song seared into my impressionable sponge-like brain but it wasn’t until my older brother mentioned that it was a comic first that my turtle-mania was complete. To see the goofy, bubble shaped, wholesome cartoon characters who ate pizza and told me not to do drugs in gritty black and white, curse, drink beer and eviscerate their foes was a young boys subversive dream come true.

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Now THAT's how you deal with Shredder, in the first damn issue no less!

TMNT #1

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles #1

Now May 1st marks the 25th anniversary of their debut in Eastman and Laird’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turltes #1 and to *ahem* shell-ebrate Mirage Studios has launched a commemorative website for the occasion, TMNT25.com. As part of the festivities the original movie will be screened at the Tribeca Film Festival this Thursday, April 23!  The full description of that days activities reads:

Catch the TMNT at the Empire State Building (34th Street and 5th Avenue) as they officially light it Turtle green during a special ceremony.

Then, follow the official TMNT Party Bus downtown as the TMNT head to the Tribeca Film Festival (200 Vesey Street between Westside Hwy & Hudson River), where a special screening of the hit 1990 movie, “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” will be shown as the Drive-In feature.

Shell-ebratory activities include a pizza party, face painting, photo opportunities with the Turtles, dancing, and mixed martial arts demonstrations with the TMNT and The American Taekwondo Association.

The pre-movie activites will go from 5 p.m. to 8 p.m., and the movie will be begin at sundown.

Sounds like an awesome day of nostalgic geekery! 😀

With Mirage Studios still publishing Tales of the TMNT monthy, 4Kids Entertainment currently airing TMNT: Back to the Sewer, not to mention the success of 2007’s TMNT cgi feature and plans for a live action/cgi hybrid follow up, it’s clear the Turtles have crawled their way out of the forgotten fads of yesteryear and plan to hold their place among the great all-time pop culture icons! Happy Anniversary Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles!